How Not to Raise a Son – AKA Avoid These Mistakes if You Care About Your Kid! (Part 4)

How Not to Raise a Son – AKA Avoid These Mistakes if You Care About Your Kid! (Part 4)

By AutomaticSlim - The “Alpha” Omega

Hello men!

So we’ve been discussing how to deal with a son who is not on the right path. He doesn’t fit in. Is being picked on / bullied and is isolated from the other kids. No friends, no girlfriends, not on teams at school. No direction in life. Just scrambling around, trying to avoid the next beat down or public humiliation. Hopefully you caught this early on. Or if not, at least you got him on the right path by high school. If not, the outlook will be bleak. As our good friend WB says, nothing is impossible until you are in the pine box -- but it will be difficult. Extremely difficult. Up until now, I have been giving examples that could be the experiences of any boy that might be struggling. Of course, some were my own, but some were not and the references have been somewhat vague. Now I will give explicit references from my own experiences as well as from others I know. This is what will happen to your kid if you don’t set him on the right path. As I have stated before, many kids will not need the direct training from his father. If he is naturally strong, athletic, charismatic. Has qualities that make other boys want to befriend him and girls want to date him. My purpose here is to address those who do not have those characteristics. To learn from my experiences and to avoid the pitfalls. Don’t let this happen to your son!

College and beyond.

OK, so your kid has gotten to this point, and for whatever reason, you stayed out of it. Shame on you. But the purpose of this piece is not to criticize, but to enlighten you as to what to expect. There are a few paths your son might take. Here are the options as I see it.

- By some miracle, he gets on the right path and turns his life around. I will admit that this is

               a greater possibility now that we have the internet and the “manosphere” (or as bem calls

               it, Gay Thunderdome – heh!). Guys like us provide a great source of info to younger guys

               in need of help (especially a friend of ours who may have stayed in college too long and

   likes McDonald's too much). But this, I think, is not so common.

            - He will be a sperg. A useless sperg playing video games and whacking off to internet porn.

              This kid may be smart. High IQ. But it will be to no avail. This kid will be living in your

              basement forever. Even if he is able to get a relatively well paying job. Your best hope

              here is that he can move in with a cousin or something, and get out of your hair.

            - He will date & marry the first hideous fat pig who shows interest in him. I know MANY guys

              from where I grew up who did this. These are the guys who will immerse themselves in things

              like spectator sports, sports fantasy leagues, sports betting. Anything to get away from piggy.

            - Finally there is the last possibility. Well not the last, as I suppose serial killer is possible. But

              the last that I know of from my personal experiences.

OK. Enough generalities. What happened with me? What happens with a 6’1” 115 lbs 17 y/o who just graduated high school? Well, he mopes around the house for a few days, and then finally his father says “Hey, you're coming to work with me tomorrow!”. He should have done that when I was 11 or 12, but hey at least he did it. So I started working as a laborer in the construction materials supply business. Humping heavy stuff like bundles of Sheetrock, taping compound, corner beads, tracks and studs, Durabond 90, boxes of nails and screws. Things like that. And I learned to drive a forklift, too. And who was teaching me this? Not Pop, as he was the owner, out making deals and playing golf with big time customers. No, I was being trained by teamsters, blue collar, lower middle class, older white guys, and by the other laborers, black guys from Harlem, (they lived near where the old Polo Grounds was situated), most of whom had been in prison at one time or another. You may remember in my last post how I described Drew Rosenhaus, the sports “super agent”, talking about his Tae Kwon Do master making him into a man.Well, for me, it was these guys (a Tae Kwon Do master would’ve been better…). One of my secondary jobs was going to the distributor and buying beer. Schmidt’s beer, as that was the favorite of the shop steward. Of course they would give me a bottle here and there and…everywhere.

Let’s hope it doesn’t get this far. Let’s hope you’ve taken an active and aggressive role in training your son from the get go. But if it does get this far, please, please, PLEASE step it up. Because if it goes past this point, there is likely no turning back for him. Sure, anything is possible, but if he doesn’t turn it around in high school, I know what will almost certainly lie ahead. And we’ll talk about that next time.

- Slim