Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint. It is typically described in terms of what an individual voluntarily refrains from doing. This includes restraint from retaliation in the form of non-violence and forgiveness, restraint from arrogance in the form of humility and modesty, restraint from excesses such as extravagant luxury or splurging now in the form of prudence, and restraint from excessive anger or craving for something in the form of calmness and self-control.
Basically, temperance is self-control. People demonstrate a lack of temperance in many ways. Often, it is losing their cool when they find something irritating, it could be giving into lust, or proud and haughty behavior.
In the 1920's, prohibition was sold as "the temperance movement". This is false. Self control does not exist when there are others removing your freedom of choice. You cannot congratulate a puppet for walking as it did nothing on it's own.
Similarly, a woman cannot demonstrate temperance until she is tempted. Watch her reaction when dealing with people she doesn't have to answer to. Is she rude and bossy to the waiter? She will be rude and bossy to you. Does she use sex/sexiness to get her way? She will continue to use it to manipulate after marriage (often restraining it from you to get her way). Does she tell little lies to others for a little advantage? She will do the same to you.
When you are dating, keep those hormone goggles off and watch for signs of dishonest behavior. There will be mistakes, we are all human. Look for signs of remorse and repentance when she does something wrong.
After marriage, make sure to continue to cultivate the self control of both of you. Engage in doing good and demonstrate a striving to do what is right. Read the scriptures together or as a family, go to church. Surround yourselves with the good influences in life.
Doing so will greatly increase your chances for a happy life and happy marriage. You will be that beacon of light that people and society looks to.
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