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| Women say they don't like this, but that is only because they are not the ones in the photo |
Women want to be treated like sex objects, men want to be treated like relationship objects.
Several years ago, I believed women when they said they don't like to be treated like sex objects. It is certainly something my wife has said, that it is disrespectful, crude and not nice. As a nice guy, I respected what she was saying and tried to not offend her in that way. Then one day, there was this return of kings article that I came across. It really made an impact on me and my wife, even though she never read it.
https://www.returnofkings.com/86716/women-will-never-admit-that-they-love-being-mistreated-and-objectified
The article states that even though they will not admit it, women typically want to be objectified. What they do not like is to have other women objectified. They will push guys away from flirtatious behavior as a test to see if we will bow down to the mighty vagina and do what they say, or if we are masculine enough to see through it. After reading the article, I decided to put this theory to the test. Over the coming couple months, I increased the frequency and intensity of my sexualizing my wife. I began with a few love taps on the butt while she is cooking, maybe a dirty joke here and there. She liked it, and the sex became more frequent and more... adventuresome. If you have not read this article, I would recommend going back to their archives and reviewing it.
Of course, there is the right time and place to objectifying your woman. Certainly not at work or at her son's piano recital, but you certainly can turn up the heat as the circumstances permit. She will like being pinned up against the wall from time to time. But in the wrong setting, there is a risk of coming off as a creep.
Is the reverse true?
I know men say they don't like to be treated like an ATM. Personally I don't like to feel used for my money. But is that really the case? If I feel that what I am doing is strengthening my family and relationship, I really enjoy doing it. I enjoy taking my wife on a nightly walk to the Post Office, I enjoy coming home and flirting with her as she is cooking dinner. The bonding between family members is really enjoyable for me. Even totally non-sexual things like having one of my kids climbing up on my lap and asking me to read a story is a joy. I may protest, (just like my wife does with sex), but that is really enjoyable and memorable for me.
As the man of the house, and being tasked as the leader, protector, and provider, I really enjoy those roles. Sure if I feel used, I don't like it, but as long as the appreciation is there, I am happy to work a full day. I am honored to be looked to for guidance and direction, even if it means taking responsibility if I make a wrong turn. I am proud to be the line of defense for my family members, even if my white knighting tendencies come out at times.
Just like there being a "creep" factor when a man comes off as too needy for sex at an inappropriate time or place, a woman can also give off a creepy vibe if she starts talking kids on a first date out to coffee. Women, don't do that.
On top of this, I love my wife doing those things that shows she is invested in our relationship. A hot cooked meal, a text during the day, feminine mannerisms, her wanting to spend time with me. Like Al Bundy, we do a little pushback and fuss when they insist we kiss them goodbye for work, but in reality, we appreciate those little things that really help make the relationship meaningful.
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| Al is doing what women do when you pinch their butt |
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